caring is sharing

image from here

i am good at sharing. i grew up as one of three girls...we shared EVERYTHING. dolls, clothes, my parents' affection. even birthday parties were shared with my sister--our b-day's were only one day apart. then when i got married, i learned to share with a boy. i shared my bed, my bar of soap, garbage duties...and even some of my secrets. we even did the unthinkable (in texas anyway) and became a one-car family. we learned to plan ahead, be patient, and even drive a little slower sometimes.

but i have to put my foot down this time. a one-computer household is not acceptable. this is one thing i am not willing to share. my laptop was officially declared dead on friday. i contemplated doing a full obituary, but it was just too painful. we had been together for five lovely years--she recorded the memories during a six-week roadtrip with my sister casey, got me through dozens of grad school research papers, and most recently, held the first story i've written about my sister jamie's death.

fortunately, when she started getting sick i bought an external hard-drive to back-up all the photos and documents i wanted to keep...but i am still grieving the loss. photoshop and quark are gone. all of the "favorite" websites i've collected over the years, gone. the photos i've taken since the last back-up was completed. it hurts. but i have to move on.

this weekend i will begin researching new laptops, and saving my pennies for this unanticipated purchase. and although i don't like it, i will continue to share david's clunky old pc until i find a suitable replacement for my dear friend.